At the moment I’m working on to back up my archives also to a modern system so I can work on the road. But it also gives me fascinating insight about how I started as a photographer and when I was an art student. I have to say the last years now I’m back in photography I grew a lot as a person. But now I also realise that in the early social media time era there was a toxic (gothic) modelling culture in the Netherlands.
Toxic modelling culture
I started seriously in photography in 2006 platforms like MySpace where popular and America Next top model had reached Dutch television to. Platforms like Dutch Gothic Models popped up as a board to connect models and photographers. Yes it was the time before selfies. But there was a downside it was all ego based. It was all about seen and being seen. So big outfits and big ego. I have to say it affect me to. I wanted to model to but did not had the confidence and skills.
As a photographer I have to say I wanted to capture the best to. But also pushed new talent to their edge. So I wasn’t always nice and not there to make friends. To be honest now I look back most just wanted to work with me to get into Noize Magazine. It was all about exposure.
How I See the future
After my break I started to look different to the world. To be honest I don’t do model shoots anymore. It’s not my type of photography however never say never. I’m more into nature and concert photography. Capture the moment the story and life around me. Capture friends show my life and what I see.
With a hug
Helene Smits
Series of self portraits “Writing” 2012
